If you could see me now, you would wonder why I'm typing with my nose touching the screen. It's because my dopey other half has took my glasses. She's away in London for the weekend, and she took my glasses instead of her own. She has her contact lenses, so she's not blind. I think I might have to invest in a second pair, but I've never needed them until today. I have some prescription sunglasses, but seeing as it doesn't get light these days, I'd still be bumping into things.
It's totally infuriating. I keep wanting to push imaginary spectacles back up to the bridge of my nose. When I put my jumper on, or wash my face, I keep trying to take my missing glasses off. I totally sympathise with recent leg amputees who still think they have an itchy ankle.
I'm exaggerating slightly. I'm not like Velma from Scooby-Doo. I can function without them, in fact, I didn't even start wearing them regularly until I was 25 or so, when the years of being a self-abusing comics nerd took their toll, but now I realise how much I do need them. If I keep squinting like this, I'll end up looking like Lee Van Cleef by the time she gets back from the Big Smoke. Still, I suppose it gives us something new to argue about, other than the usual money and sex disagreements. I think she charges me too much.