Monday was one of those nights when it's rubbish being a parent. My youngest is leaving primary school and will be going to what is called 'big school' . To celebrate this fact, her school put on a play that I was emotionally blackmailed into watching. The play was a cautionary taleabout kids going to secondary school and gettting sucked into gang culture and bullying. It was a musical!
My daughter was only in the choir, meaning she was shoved up the side of the hall where I could hardly see her anyway. I went with my other daughter, who thinks she's too cool for this kind of stuff, but if I have to sit through it, so does she. I'm an equal opportunities parent. It pissed down on the way, so I was soaked before I got there, and the hall we watched the play in was roasting hot, very humid and stuffy, so I quickly dried out and starting sweating. The kids have their dinner in the same hall, as well, so the place stunk of fish. It was either the lingering smell of old dinners, or one of the parents or staff had an intimate hygiene problem.
I hate school plays. I generally don't like anything where children are singing. Bugsy Malone is my idea of hell. I'm glad that fat bloke won Britain's Got Talent and not that gappy brummie child. Kids should be out playing on their bikes, not fannying around singing songs about a rat. I think, because I was a young parent, I'm not as far removed from bowel-emptyingly horrible times when I had to sing in public as a child, so I'm feeling embarassed for the kids. don't get me wrong, most of the kids sung their songs well, but some of them didn't. They were really bad. I felt bad for hating them, I felt bad for them. Mostly, I wanted it to be finished so I get my sweaty arse out of the hot halibut halitosis hall and get some fresh air.
Thing is, we had nothing like this when I left primary school, school plays and days out (my daughter went bowling with the school, as well)!) all I got was a brief 'ta-ra' or 'Haven't you fucked off YET, Trimble?' We don't half make a fuss over everything these days.